Monday, November 2, 2009

96.

Some new beauty work from a couple of weeks ago:



Shot by: Jeremy James
Hair & Makeup: Me.
Model: Julia @ Trump




I am really happy with the way these turned out. She was such a perfect model for this job and I would love to work with her again!

In other news, I got a "wake up call" as some say on saturday... I've been waiting tables at a place for over a year and a half and as of late I've been slipping as an employee. I'll be the first to admit that I've been an asshole. I have always struggled with being tardy but, lately its been more rough than usual. Not to mention, out of fear - I'd lie about being late. A co-worker put it to me this way...

Would you ever be 30-45 minutes late for a makeup job? The answer in all honesty is probably not. I may be 10 minutes late but, not enough to be putting anyone out and making them wait for me. I was sent home and asked to 'really think about whether or not I want to be there and not to get in touch until I get my shit together'. I've been thinking about it for 2 days and I really don't know what to do. I've never thought myself to be irresponsible and careless as far as my work ethic goes. I've actually scolded people for having a shitty work ethic! Pot meet kettle.

As long as I've worked in the service industry I've a. never been fired from a job, b. always left on good terms and c. have always felt like with every wait/bartending job there is a life span of enthusiasm. There is always a limit to how long someone can work at a certain place before they start subconsiously self sabotaging. In every other job, I've always known when I was getting to my wits end and gracefully moved on but, maybe out of fear of needing to look for a new job I passed that point with this job? I'm not entirely sure. I've been really unfair to my co-workers and basically a straight up a-hole to my boss by acting the way I've been acting. It's sad because I really love all my co-workers and I love the place but, I have some real hard thinking to do. I've been getting down on myself for still being in the service industry in general (but then again, who doesn't - ha). I know I'm working my way up doing makeup but it is such a slow process that I need that extra cash flow to live the lifestyle I want to live.

Rock//Hardplace.

I guess I have some more thinking to do. But, today - I will meet up with my unicorn and ask her advice (my old darling roomate who is made of sunshine and rainbows and is a beacon of light and optimism). And I will knit.

xx.
theshittyemployee.
erngrn.

3 comments:

Team Knit ! said...

ooh, sometimes life deals us some hard, self-evaluating lessons. You'll know the right choice is the one that isn't the easiest, but is the one most likely to improve your general work happiness. As a side note, I was really unhappy in my job for a while, until I realized it wasn't that bad at all- I actually had it pretty easy. The problem was in my head, not in the job itself. Once I adjusted how I thought of my job, I've been much happier at work, and more productive. For what it's worth!

- Julie

loveisallyouknit said...

Ugh, sorry to hear you have to be forced with that decision. Hopefully the knitting will help.

Susan said...

That can be rough. I think we have all been there. It's frustrating for sure. Good luck sorting it all out.